9 Tell-Tale Signs It’s Over

July 13, 2007 § 3 Comments

dating_blog.jpgDating is definitely an exciting adventure because you step outside yourself and engage in an exploration of human compatibility. The journey is always sweet–in the beginning. But, as you trudge along you may discover that some elements of your relationship are tell-tale signs that the journey is over—or at least should be.

1You haven’t done anything new or out of the ordinary with your significant other in quite awhile. Relationships will become stale, boring, and probably predictable if you don’t try new things together. If your dates are becoming the same scenario week after week, it means you’re not learning more about each other.

2Phone conversations are often replaced by text messages or instant messages. Sure, this generation is all about technology and rightfully so! Both modes of communicating are embedded in convenience because they are quick and easy methods that allow people to multi-task. But, if texting and AIM are becoming the main modes of communication, then you’re probably heading for trouble because it is often hard to read emotions or fully understand the tone of conversations when you’re looking at words on a phone or computer screen.

3 You don’t hang out together as much as you used to. This could simply mean you are one half of a pair of passing ships in the sea because you’re both super busy. But, it can also mean that your guy/girl wants to spend time doing something else, which is completely fine because you should each welcome space. However, if it gets to a point where you’re barely seeing each other, that’s probably a good indication one of you is losing interest.

4You’ve been dating a pretty long time and yet haven’t met any of your significant other’s friends and he or she has expressed no interest whatsoever in meeting yours. There comes a point in every relationship where you should acknowledge your relationship to your peers. Afterall, your friends are people you genuinely like and you usually respect their opinions. So why not introduce them. If you’re truly happy in your relationship, you should have no qualms about it. And if you do, it probably means you either have commitment problems or someone on the side.

5Little things that never used to bother you about your significant other appear to suddenly leave a sour taste in your mouth. When you’re truly content in your relationship, you’ll find that you accept or ignore the things he/she does that are annoying. But, after a while if these annoyances seem to jump out at you and frustrate you, then it may mean you’re simply not happy enough with everything else in the relationship to ignore these minor irritations.

6You complain to your friends about the relationship. When we complain to our friends about a significant other, it probably means we aren’t taking care of business by addressing our problem directly to our significant other. This is never good for obvious reasons.

7You haven’t had a serious discussion about where the relationship is going in a while. This should really be a red-flag, but many of us overlook it because we get so caught up in the fairy-tale idea of dating. And we’d rather be in any relationship (even if it’s not our ideal) than be solo. The point of dating is to spend enough time together to see if you both are compatible enough to become more serious. Sound old-fashioned? Probably, but it’s how many people think, even today. Not addressing this during the dating stage is a clear sign that the person you’re with isn’t interested in a commitment any time this century. If you aren’t interested in a commitment either, then celebrate! You’re definitely on the same page. But, if you are pro-commitment, take the hint and move on.

8You can no longer communicate with the person, and if you try to–you’re ignored. Communication is the main gel that will hold any relationship together, whether it be professional or romantic. So, if you can’t even find it in yourself to be honest with the person your dating and communicate your feelings (good or bad), this relationship is probably not going to last too long. And if you ignore them, it’s basically telling the other person he or she isn’t important enough to communicate with or that you don’t trust the person.

9Trying to salvage the relationship seems like more work than it’s worth. If for any reason you feel like you aren’t being appreciated or you’re the only one putting thought and effort into fixing a relationship that is faltering, then don’t even bother. It’s not fair to salvage something the other person doesn’t care about. That’s basically too much work for little reward.


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§ 3 Responses to 9 Tell-Tale Signs It’s Over

  • sovereignsplendor says:

    this layout is TUFF!!!

  • claire says:

    a lot of these apply to me and what ive done. like my fiance has met my friends but it took me a while to introduce them cause i felt as though they had little incommon. and as for the bad mouthing our relationship to other peope, i think ive done this quite a lot to bc we are from diffreent cultures, and i need objectivity from outside sources, getting pregnant after two months of knowing him didnot help us at all. its tough trying to make it work. ive stopped clling him ab my worries as much bc im tired of feeling worried,, but little things have been getting on my nerves more about him. such as his persoanl hygiene, i thinkhe smells bad often, and wishhe’d make more of an effort for me.

  • Almost mistress says:

    I’ve been fighting an affair for two years now. Initially the chemistry was almost blinding. Now realising that our social lives will never mesh has frustrated me to the point where i’m no longer interested in pursuing it. I often complain about him to friends, i don’t even feel like calling or taking his calls; he’s not a priority. This article is spot on. Great stuff

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